5 Questions from Four Thousand Weeks

I started off the new year by finishing the book Four Thousand Weeks: Time Management for Mortals by Oliver Burkeman. The final chapter included these five questions:

1. Where in your life or your work are you currently pursuing comfort, when what’s called for is a little discomfort?
2. Are you holding yourself to, and judging yourself by, standards of productivity or performance that are impossible to meet?
3. In what ways have you yet to accept the fact that you are who you are, not the person you think you ought to be?
4. In which areas of life are you still holding back until you feel like you know what you’re doing?
5. How would you spend your days differently if you didn’t care so much about seeing your actions reach fruition?

Also, “It doesn’t matter if answers aren’t immediately forthcoming; the point, in Rainer Maria Rilke’s famous phrase, is to ‘live the questions.’ Even to ask them with any sincerity is already to have begun to come to grips with the reality of your situation and to start to make the most of your finite time.”

As we start a new year, best wishes in your approximately 4,000 weeks on Earth!

2003, the year in books

My 2023 reading list included some from my #ClassicNovels MeetUp (led by my brother, Dave) and some more from the #MRxPros (Marketing Research professionals) book club. My favorite book that I finished in 2023 was My Life in Full by Indra Nooyi, former CEO of PepsiCo.

Here’s a list of the books that I finished in 2023:

1. Shoe Dog
2. The Science of Storytelling
3. Madame Bovary
4. Arrow of God
5. Songs That Made a Mark
6. No Longer At Ease
7. Pride and Prejudice
8. A More Beautiful Question
9. The Scarlet Letter
10. The Stranger
11. My Life in Full
12. Let My People Go Surfing
13. Moby Dick
14. The Good Life
15. Creativity, Inc.
16. Tell Me More: Stories about the 12 Hardest Things I’m Learning to Say
17. Treasure Island
18. The Reversal
19. Talk Like Ted: The 9 Public Speaking Secrets of the World’s Top Minds
20. Deep Work
21. Candide or Optimism
22. From Strength to Strength?: Finding Success, Happiness, & Deep Purpose in the 2nd Half of Life
23. We Need to Hangout: A Memoir of Making Friends
24. Adventures of Huckleberry Finn
25. Friendship in the Age of Loneliness
26. Gone with the Wind
27. 9 Dragons
28. With All Due Respect: Defending America

Plus, there were a few books I started but had to return them to the library (because others were waiting for them) and will return to finish them in the future.

What did you read/enjoy in 2023? And which would you recommend to others?

Let’s all go to the movies

I read in The Kansas City Star that this Saturday, September 3rd, is National Cinema Day and it was also mentioned in several national media sources, including Entertainment Weekly. I’m hoping to take in at least one movie on Saturday, even if that means I record my beloved Buckeyes as Notre Dame plays at Ohio State to kick off the College Football season.

Looking at AMC Barrywoods down the street from me, there’s something for almost everyone:

1. Cartoons like Minions: The Rise of Gru, DC League of Super Pets, or Dragon Ball Super: Super Hero
2. Marvel movies like Spider-Man: No Way Home or Thor: Love & Thunder
3. Action films with big name starts like BulletTrain (Pitt) or Top Gun: Maverick (Cruise)
4. Action films with non-human creatures like Beast, Jurassic World Dominion or JAWS (1975)
5. A movie about a musician: Elvis
6. A movie based on a book: Where the Crawdads Sing
7. Honk for Jesus, Save Your Soul (with one of the stars of This is Us)
8. and the ever popular much, much more

So start off the three-day holiday weekend by going to the movies (although if you could leave a spot for me, that would be great) and then turn on football to join me in rooting against the Fighting Irish.

Then on Tuesday, it’s back to work.

Next steps in different stages of life

Moving to a new home and starting school can be stressful times for those directly involved… and their lived ones, too.

On Thursday, my Mom chose to move into Assisted Living. She will still be fortunate enough to be at McCrite Senior Living but will have increased support.

This Monday, five of my seven grandkids will start a new school year. One starts her high school education, one begins his year at the 6th Grade Center, one starts his final year of elementary, another continues his elementary education, and yet another starts her first day of kindergarten.

I’m excited (and nervous) for each of them as well as myself. How can we support those going through transitions, both known and unknown?

Buyer’s Remorse, FOMO, or Imposter Syndrome? No x 3

Three weeks ago, I started a new job. During my job search, I’d considered lots of companies and similar to when I bought new vehicles a few years go, I’d wondered if there would be any regrets, i.e. FOMO, buyer’s remorse, or imposter syndrome.

Thankfully, I’ve had none of those with my relatively new vehicles or with my brand new job.

FOMO is Fear of Missing Out … wondering if you had just waited a little longer, would something better have come along. Related to that is Buyer’s Remorse is regret about the decision you made and wondering if you’re going to like the vehicle or job.

Imposter Syndrome is again looking at the fit but in the other direction … am I worthy of the vehicle or job?

Well, after 5 years, I still love my Chevy Silverado and the ability to haul stuff whether it’s supplies for a home improvement project, helping people move, or taking old junk to the dump / donating stuff I no longer need to Habitat Restore or one of the local thrift shops. And I’m worthy of having a truck because I’ve actually used it for all those things I just mentioned. And our other car is a Subaru Forester which came loaded with all kinds if safety features because I want to do everything I can to make sure my wife is safe.

For my job, it’s the right company & job for me plus I’m the right one for the role. I had other companies with whom I was in ongoing conversations and one of those might have also been a good fit but this opportunity feels like a great fit with my background, my skills and strengths and what I like doing.

I’m getting to work remote which means being closer to family plus not only finally creating my long-planned sports room nut also having it double as my office. Now I get to spend more time with my wife and also see my sports memorabilia while doing a job I actually enjoy.

Life is good!

The Ultimate Sacrifice

As we celebrate Memorial Day, remember to honor the memories of those that made the ultimate sacrifice in service to their nation. And while we should be thankful to all veterans, the holiday to honor them is November 11th; today is specifically about those who died while serving in the military.

Next Stage of my Career

As of June 1st, 2021, I’ll be working at Bellomy as Senior Research Manager.  They’re a Marketing Research company based in Winston-Salem, North Carolina, although I’ll be remote from Kansas City.

I want to thank several of my past bosses:

• Randy Crabtree at Elrick & Lavidge
• Cathy Allin and Alex Sodek at Decision Insight
• Kim, AnnMarie, Tracy, Jim and Michelle at The Kansas City Star
• Andrea Rowan at excelerate

I want to thank all those that helped me to this point in my career but here are just a few:

• Marilyn Donatello at Maple Woods Community College who helped a high school senior explore careers … yes, I picked Marketing Research as my career while still in high school
• Dr. Steve Parker, my favorite professor and advisor while earning my Bachelor’s Degree at Missouri State University
• Dr. Greg Allenby, my professor (Multivariate Analysis for Decision Making) during my MBA at The Ohio State University
• the folks at USDA Forestry Services, Worlds of Fun and The Ohio State University Medical Center for providing me with some of my earliest experience as a marketing research professional
• Bill Hartel at Hallmark Cards who shared the wisdom “If you’re not selling, you better be supporting someone that is”
• Tony Berg at McClatchy who was more than a co-worker or boss; he has been a true friend for several years now
• Kim Nussbaum for helping me launch MCDC/McClatchy LIFT, Kim Woods for helping me roll it out to all of McClatchy and Isaac Hindle for doing LOTS of work behind the scenes to keep it running for 6 years
• Adam, Anna, Sally, Andy, Tekle, Ilea, Brian and many more with whom I had the privilege to work at excelerate research
• Carlos Pelay for great collaboration on creating the Automated Research Tool (ART) that helped us make the continuous workflow a little more manageable
• Francis Lopez for being the sole survivor within the McClatchy Research+Insights team
• Kim and Vana as we tackled “other duties as assigned” including projects like Food Truck Friday, United Way, and Project Warmth Kansas City

I’ve already had a great welcome from the folks at Bellomy and want to thank Carolyn for guiding me through the interview and onboarding process. I am truly excited as I’m starting this next stage of my career.

Fight Childhood Cancer … 1 Cup at a Time

We’re only one week away from Midwest Lemonade Days which is a fundraiser for the Alex’s Lemonade Stand Foundation. Go to HyVee grocery stores in the Kansas City area between 11am and 5pm on Friday, June 4, or Saturday, June 6. Buying a cup of lemonade helps in the fight against childhood cancer.

You can also donate online through this fundraising page for my daughter-in-law, Lauren. Let’s help make a difference and put an end to childhood cancer.

Ghosts

Recently we watched the remake of Ghostbusters and my granddaughter wandered in for the scene with the giant marshmallow man so she later said that she wanted to see the movie again even though she only saw one scene.

Ghosting is something that occurs in relationships, both romantic and professional. In romantic relationships, some people ignore others which is kind of rude. This was actually mentioned in the most recent episode of This is Us.

On a professional level, there’s a lot of ghosting in the interview process. As a candidate, it’s very frustrating to not hear back from a company to which you applied. I get it that a recruiter can’t reply to every application but if it progresses to an interview (or more) it seems like common courtesy to keep the candidate informed about whether they’re still a candidate. However, I had a couple companies with whom I had multiple interviews but am assuming that I’m no longer a candidate since I’ve not heard anything in awhile.

Switching sides of the equation, how much (or little) should the candidates update employers? If you’re in final stages with one company when another one asks for an interview, do you continue? What about those with whom you’re already in process? And how does that change when you get an offer or if you actually accept an offer?

These are real questions and I’d like input from colleagues from both sides, especially those that have been involved in the process of applying or hiring within the last year.

Winning in Kansas City

It’s great to once again see a winning team in Kansas City.

As I write this, the Kansas City Royals have the best record (16-9 or .640) in Major League baseball although they’re currently losing in the 7th inning so I better go ahead and publish this or they’ll fall out of first before I do so.

I love the Royals and find watching baseball relaxing. I also enjoy football but a single loss is more painful there because of the fewer number of games. And that’s true whether we’re talking about the NFL / Kansas City Chiefs or NCAA / The Ohio State University Buckeyes.

The Royals have been to 4 World Series: they lost in 1980 and 2014; they won in 1985 and 2015. Hopefully, we don’t have to wait another 30 years for another championship. Of course, the Chiefs had an even longer drought. They lost Super Bowl I and won Super Bowl IV (both before the game was named the Super Bowl, by Chiefs owner Lamar Hunt) and won the championship following the 2019 season and lost the season after the 2020 season. So those championships were 50 years apart.

By the way, The Kansas City Star released a couple of great books about the 2014 and 2015 seasons and, for some reason, I bought multiple copies. So, if you (or someone you know) is a big Royals fan and in need of some reading materials, go to Facebook Marketplace for the details: https://www.facebook.com/marketplace/item/3949423205146767/

I hope the Royals can keep winning and return to the post-season. But, win or lose, I’m a true-blue KC Royals fan.